The Night We Said Our Goodbyes
Tuesday, August 25, 2015
The Night We Said Our Goodbyes


You're leaving and it's hard for me to take that in. Just a day that you are gone and I could feel your absence like a part of me wishes you were still around to make sure I was ok. You've been great and I won't forget that you were the one who saw something in me. You believed in me and gave me the chance to start a new. It was a terrifying change but you helped me out through it.

And I won't forget the night we said our goodbyes. The warm and affection of your touch as you warp yourself around me was just too much to take. I wanted it to last longer but I couldn't. I just couldn't.
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I Just Know There Isn’t
Tuesday, July 21, 2015
I Just Know There Isn’t



I’ve never found myself in this position, the sense of guilt, knowing that there is no other way but none, the feeling that it’s not exactly what you wanted but it’s there.

It’s rather confusing, tiring even, to conform to behaviors that is expected, to think that we all deserve to be seen beyond the surface, trusting that with some pixie dust it will turn out better.

Perhaps it wouldn’t, perhaps it will and that's where I wanted to be still, to let go of expectations and hope for any signs to suffice.

I just know there isn’t.

photo by Theo Gosselin
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I'm Not Good With Judgement, At Least Not Anymore
Monday, July 20, 2015
I'm Not Good With Judgement, At Least Not Anymore



I wasn't expecting any of this to happen... and I meant that in a good way. I was drawn to you. A depiction of someone I never thought existed; a gentle heart, a kind soul, something rare that I would have thought guys like you cease to exist.

Yet I'm not exactly sure if I'm even saying it right. I'm not good with judgement, at least not anymore. It always appear as though I'm the one dreaming, trapped in this illusion that lies in my head. Needless to say, I needed to feel what I felt that night; a smudgeness of love, a tint of false hope.

photo via anonymous



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I'm Just Not Good With Goodbyes
Wednesday, July 01, 2015
I'm Just Not Good With Goodbyes



This is how it's suppose to end isn't it? The sad goodbyes, the whole you needed to see me before you go kind of thing. I couldn't bring myself to it. I'm not good with goodbyes nor am I good with dealing emotions I buried a long time ago. I just didn't want to feel it anymore.

Yet when I saw your message in middle of the night, my heart dropped and I couldn't breathe. I wasn't expecting this. So much had happened over the course of months that I have completely forgotten how I once felt; the joy, the pain and now it's all rushing back in.

Perhaps I was hoping I'd see you again, but not this way, not now, not yet. And I guess now I never will and I'm ok with it.


photo via anonymous
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I Was Waiting All Night For This
Monday, June 29, 2015
I Was Waiting All Night For This


It was a blurry night wasn't it? Some sporadic off-the-mill kind of evening where we're just waiting for something to happen. And when it did, it was two lips ravaging each other after hours and hours of pauses, subtle touches, slow hand held and quiet stares.

I was waiting all night for this to happen. That's what you told me when we finally got the chance to get away from your friends and be on our own at a busy corner in hopes no familiar faces would see us.

Perhaps I felt the same and in that moment I heard nothing but the sound of my body craving for your every touch and every kiss; consuming me, drowning me.

photo by anonymous
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